Thinking Bigger

This week I was called upon to write a summary of what has changed in the last year for the Kareng Fund, specifically in response to the wonderful grant we received from the Rex Foundation. It quickly came to me that while business went on as usual, there was a subtle but gigantic shift in how I, at least, think of the Fund, my role as a Board member for the nonprofit, and by connection, my role in the Saturday Market and the segment of life surrounding me as a craftsperson in Eugene.

If you live here, you know by now that we are in a boom town. For whatever reasons, lots of people want to live in Eugene now and are rapidly buying houses and properties and making the move, here and to other parts of the PNW. The scenario is the same everywhere: richer people move in and poorer people are pushed out. I'm not feeling the pressure yet, as my house is paid for and I'm not planning on moving, but I do fear as an aging person that my options will be more limited. I'm counting on having a network of people so I might be able to find a solution that works for me, without having to be warehoused or living in my car. Since I'm only 66 and doing well, it still seems a distant and vague plan, but the years do fly by.

What Pogo Said

The place my Mom moved to is fine for her; she likes it. She has no responsibilities for maintenance and most of her needs are very well met, so it looks pretty good to my sisters to live in a place like that. To me it looks grim, like nothing at all that I want for myself. That's powerful denial and a fantasy that I will be able to either keep using stairs or get the modifications I might need...it would be quite a remodel to make this house accessible. I suppose I could trade this valuable property for another, which is kind of what she did. You sell your house and then have the money to put something in place for the rest of your time. So there's that... let's just change the subject.

So keeping my network and putting in my giving time is a big part of this time in my life, and the Kareng Fund service is one of the best parts of my volunteer efforts. We help people who really need it, sometimes so much that they won't even ask. We gave more grants than ever this past year, partly because of the Rex grant, and partly because we have a lot of aging craftspeople in our midst. I have noticed that linking ourselves with a giant like the Rex Foundation made me think bigger about us. We provide something very needed, and to the people we help, our help is big. It can be pivotal. More than the money and what it facilitates, we give support. You hear from us, real people who took a moment to care about you. We've often been told that knowing someone cares is the most important emotion our recipients feel in the heat of their crisis. We're with you.

And that is what is so important about my role in the Saturday Market, too, and in Fair and the Tuesday Market, and even in the Radar Angels and Jell-O Art Show. I offer support. I'm there with you. I'm selling downtown two days a week, talking to lots of locals, tourists, and my fellow vendors. When I'm not there, a little bit of our local color is dimmed...and not just me, of course, but any of our artisans, our Board members, our customers, our neighbors, all of us. We all shine a little differently and make up the rich colors that make us so attractive to these new folks who want a piece of what we have.

Eugene is full of nice, caring people who go out of their way to help others. This goes in both directions, to help those in need, but also at the other financial end, to facilitate things for people who want to do big things of their own. We draw our lines: lots of us see no need to help multinational or even smaller corporations come here to exploit us, but those who do help them see the jobs and taxes that are paid as justification for the help that is given. Some people feel that we should not be so helpful and welcoming to people who don't bring any of those things, people who don't seem to be contributing. The whole FSP situation brings out the worst of some of us Market people who see our resources being used by those who aren't paying in like we are.

I personally have come to terms with it. We don't always get to choose how our gifts are received. We are there for the public, to create an event, and it isn't always up to us who enjoys our event and how they enjoy it. The people who come through and don't see our culture and offend us in some way, with their dogs or their stoned questions or their littering or their loud music on a corner we don't rent, are not within our control. The more we try to control them, the more we actually lose in the effort. We do need to have rules and ask that they be respected. On Saturday Security told someone with a dog in the fountain that we don't allow that, and after the guy pretty much ignored the Security guy, his dog shook water all over my bags. Nothing was ruined, and it's my fault for having merchandise right there next to the water, but it's a good example of something that was not planned. They guy didn't make his dog do that, or even foresee it, but he also didn't apologize to me for it, or even notice it as far as I know. We had a little clash of cultures, and I kind of lost, and that is how we build up resentment and forget to love the people who are not even necessarily aware of our rules and the logic behind them. The people using the Plaza don't know that I am paying for the bathrooms and promotions that benefit them, and in fact they think that they are part of the attraction and are giving just as I am. So my solution for the FSP problems and the use of Park Blocks problems is the hardest way we're going to find to solve them: we need to get a lot of us together, with people from the drum circle and those who feel the right to sell for free, and the landlords who feel the need to charge us and not them, and see if we can all come to some group agreements that will work for all of us. You can see why no progress is made in making changes down there with that challenge ahead. There isn't a simple solution.

My back yard more than two decades ago

Eugene is just experiencing the tiniest glimmer of a beginning of the ways the boom economy is going to change us. My neighbor is about to tear off the oldest part of the house next door, the part I want intact for my research on the neighborhood, but as with the fence I didn't want, to them it will be a big improvement and I don't get a say about it. All of the property developments that are going to come, the cellphone towers, the high rises, the old people's warehouses and fancy townhouses and luxury student housing, all of those things are going to happen because the people who want them see them as improvements, good things, that will make life better. Sure, there's greed in there, and exploitation, but mostly it's pretty nice people not seeing the harm in their decisions, not really caring how it looks to you or feels like destruction of something you love, because they are powerfully carrying out their visions that they think are good ones.

I think Saturday Market will continue to thrive with the increase in population, because we offer something truly valuable, the intimacy of art, but at the same time the New Zone and the Jacobs close, and may not be replaced, and we may have our own challenges of place. The Farmers worry that they will lose the awkward space they do have in a PB remodel...we fear that too. We see that the trashing of the blocks by the heavy use of people living there has hurt us, and could hurt our survival there, but we all hope that the caring people will prevail and the affection for place will be true for them too. We hope the people selling at FSP will learn to value the event like we do, and work to make it safer and better and find reasons to pitch in.

Two Queens

And the Kareng Fund has to work to keep thinking bigger, something that doesn't come naturally to me. We have to challenge ourselves to reach out in bigger circles, plan more ambitious fundraising events, step up to get into the ranks of the important nonprofits in the funding cycle so we can find our loyal donors who will sustain our efforts. Since we live in such a nice place among such good people, this should not be an uphill battle. It's more of an inner struggle, for me at least, to trust growth and change, to see that often it is good and better, and that I can think bigger too. It seems counter-intuitive to the way I'm aging, when I'm trying to get simpler and make things easier, to size down and work less and rest more, but I'm not doing it by myself. We're finding younger people, people with more energy, to supplement our earned wisdom with new ideas and the ability to take more chances. Keeping an open mind to change and a positive attitude about it are all I really have to do to keep up. That and not dig in and stand in the way of change.

As long as the boom has room, there's no way around it but to ride it. As the Radar Angels, always ahead of the zeitgeist, put it in the Jell-O Show, we're riding the gravitational wave, headed for the Jell-O Getaway. There are great waves in the Jell-O Getaway. Face it, we live in a town where we have Queens for events that are long gone, and we love that about ourselves. No one who moves here wants to ruin that. For this first part of our increasing popularity, we just get to revel in it. We get to have a good Market season and put away money for when our rents all go sky-high. We get to support the organizations we love and places we love, support them and keep them alive and share them a little while they shine. We get to crown another Queen and keep doing that as long as we want to.

 We aren't in charge of the future, not really even in charge of the now, but we can do a lot to enjoy it more while we have it. Let's keep loving and giving and see how that works. It's the best we can do for each other and for ourselves.